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Home Ecards
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It is a sad thing but sometimes people can get sick and this may occasionally result in the interruption of one's plans. Experience has taught me that nobody likes it when you leave a bed-side vigil to go jet-skiing. I believe this is because people are fundamentally irrational. Send a Get Well card and THEN you can go jet-skiing.
transubstantiation
I've never known much about religion. I guess I'm agnostic because I don't want to wind up having to look surprised. Sadly, having a foot in both camps just means everyone feels obligated to preach at you. Today's card is about the Eating of the Eucharist. It's my way of coping with being recently told that it's not a biscuit.
evidence
I never like to hear people arguing about religion because that means they're not sitting there listening attentively to me. Everyone has a different approach to religious debate. Mine is to scream: That Is Anathema! until everyone leaves. I guess it's important to win.
war
One day an old lady on a bus told me that my being drafted into a war would probably fix everything that she instantly didn't like about me. I realized right away that this is why young people no longer introduce themselves with the words 'at your disposal'.
moral vacuum
It's re-hash Wednesday, and normally I'd like to touch upon the Great Themes of Western Philosophy but sadly the whole Western canon was recently patented by Apple. So here is a picture of some very happy rabbits.
usefulness
The question of where one stands on the topic of Family largely depends on how much advice they've given you. I've been subjected to special quantities of well-intentioned advice that I've never followed. This is, incidentally, why I'm not an oyster farmer.
vacation
In the US everyone seems to go on vacation in August - my inbox is full of out-of-office emails. If they're not doing anything, I'm not either: and did I mention today is re-hash Wednesday? Screw work, I'm off to steal office supplies. And maybe I'll redirect all print queues to the Vatican. The day is pregnant with possibilities...
debilitating
Babies happen, and when one happens near you, you'd best be prepared. I'm not saying that babies aren't great to be around for a few minutes but there ARE a lot of good PC games coming out in the next three months. What's today's card? Your ticket to freedom.
mayonnaise
Today is re-hash Wednesday; I post an older card and then ever so slightly exaggerate my plans for the rest of the afternoon. By the way, I hope today's card doesn't discourage anyone. Frankly, I hope it inspires a certain spirit of scientific inquiry.
shoes
Excuses cards are intended to help you evade unwanted social engagements. It's always better to send a card than to show up and discover you need to stab someone in the leg with a fork. Unless they're serving profiteroles - those can often be worth the fuss.